


we could be in love

by matchapuudding (kuntenjohnil)



Category: NCT (Band), WAYV
Genre: Alternate Universe - Childhood Friends, Fluff, Growing Up Together, Light Angst, M/M, Mentioned Wong Kun Hang | Hendery, Mutual Pining, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-01
Updated: 2021-01-01
Packaged: 2021-03-11 04:08:27
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,446
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28478949
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kuntenjohnil/pseuds/matchapuudding
Summary: Sicheng is always there in every page of Kun's life.How does one know whether what they feel is love, or it is just because we are so used to the presence of someone that we can’t imagine life without them?
Relationships: Dong Si Cheng | WinWin/Qian Kun
Comments: 10
Kudos: 62
Collections: #KunFanWeek2021





	we could be in love

Kun was seven and Sicheng was six.

“Baby,” Kun’s mom shouted from the kitchen. “Can you open the door, please?”

Kun put his ukulele on his bed then answered, “Okay, mom! Coming!”

The bell was ringing for the second time when Kun arrived at the door. He opened it to be greeted with a tall, sweet looking lady carrying a steaming dish in her hands.

“Hello,” The lady smiled. “May I know if your parents are home?”

Kun nodded. “Yes, my mom is in the kitchen right now. Do you mind waiting for a bit while I get her, Ma’am?”

The lady smiled even wider, seemingly pleased with Kun’s good manner. “I don’t mind at all, that would be lovely!”

“Please have a seat Ma’am,” Kun motioned to the lady to have a seat on the long chair placed at their porch, then he hurriedly went to the kitchen to get her mom.

Kun’s mom, together with Kun, emerged from the kitchen not too long after. She then greeted their new guest warmly, “Good morning!”

“Good morning,” The lady smiled widely again and offered the dish that she’d been holding. “We are The Dongs, we just moved yesterday into the house next door.”

“Oh, welcome to the neighborhood!” Kun’s mom accepted the dish and smiled sweetly. “We are The Qians. Our family has been living here ever since my son Kun was born, seven years ago, and I can pretty much say that this area is great for families. The neighbors are nice, and we usually have gatherings every three months or so. Anyway, if you ever need any help, please don’t hesitate to come to us! I am always at home, so we can have chitchats over coffee anytime!”

“Thank you so much, that is really sweet of you! Oh, your son here is seven years old?” Mrs. Dong looked at Kun who was standing next to his mom.

“Ah, yes! This is Kun, my son! Honey, why don’t you introduce yourself to Mrs. Dong?” Kun’s mom gave a little push so Kun could come forward.

Kun nodded, then offered his hand to Mrs. Qian. “Hello Mrs. Dong, my name is Kun, I am seven years old and I am in my second grade of primary school. My school is at the end of the road there. Nice to meet you, Ma’am.” Kun smiled, dimples full on display.

Mrs. Dong smiled even wider and tried very hard not to squeal, “Nice to meet you too, Kun. I happen to have a son too, just a year younger than you,” she then looked behind her, “Sicheng baby? Let’s say hello to your new gege?”

Kun and his mom didn’t even realize that there was someone hiding behind Mrs. Dong’s tall stature. A little boy, shorter and tinier than Kun, finally peeked out. He was still seemingly shy to the new people in front of him, as he only made his eyes visible to both Kun and his mom.

“Baby? Would you introduce yourself, please?” Mrs. Dong tried to coax the little boy again.

The little boy looked at his mom’s eyes. After his mom gave him an encouraging nod, the little boy nodded back and slowly came forward.

“Good morning, my name is Dong Sicheng, I am six years old,” said the little boy softly.

Kun’s mom bent her body a bit and gave a soft smile, fully understanding the young boy’s hesitance. Moving to a new environment can be really hard, especially when it comes to young kids. “Hello Sicheng, it’s very nice to meet you,” she then looked back at Mrs. Dong, “Is Sicheng going to go to the same school with Kun?”

Mrs. Dong nodded excitedly. “Yes! He will be starting his first grade next week. He’ll be behind for a couple of weeks, but the teacher is willing to give him extra help so that he can understand the lessons!”

“Oh, that’s really great! Kun usually walks to school since it is only nearby, so maybe they can go to school together?” asked Kun’s mom.

Mrs. Dong let out a sigh of relief. “Yes, of course! That would be really great, if Kun doesn’t mind!”

Kun’s mom looked at his son, “What do you think, Kun? And maybe you can help a thing or two with Sicheng’s lessons, since you have already mastered all of the first grade lessons?”

Kun looked at Sicheng instead.

The small boy looked at Kun at first, but then he immediately diverted his gaze at the ground when he realized that Kun was looking back at him. Sicheng looked very shy, and Kun recognized a fleeting pleading look in Sicheng’s eyes just then when he was looking at Kun, like he was pleading for help, for protection.

And Kun wanted to protect this boy.

“Of course, Mom. I will take care of Sicheng, don’t worry.”

  
  


_____

  
  


Kun was eight and Sicheng was seven.

Although Sicheng had spent a year in the new neighborhood and the new school, he was still the timid and quiet child that Kun knew a year ago. He would only talk to Kun when prompted, and Kun would still patiently try to make Sicheng talk and open up more to him. Sicheng also didn’t really talk much to his classmates. He only did his schoolwork as instructed by his teachers, and he didn’t really want to mingle with anyone.

Which was why he was an easy target for the bullies.

Mrs. Dong was a working mom, same goes with Mr. Dong. Both of them didn’t really have time to prepare a proper lunch box for Sicheng, so they gave him meal allowance instead.

But they didn’t know that Sicheng never bought any snack with the money, as the bullies would always demand money from Sicheng, and he didn’t have any choice but to give the money to them. He never told anyone about this.

But Kun knew.

It all started when they were walking back home, and Sicheng’s stomach suddenly grumbled. Kun was concerned, so he offered Sicheng to have lunch together at his house, since he knew that Sicheng’s parents usually wouldn’t be home by the time they arrived home. Sicheng told him that his mom usually left him some money to order for deliveries so that he could have lunch at home. Kun then asked whether Sicheng had any snack during school break, but Sicheng avoided his eyes when he said that he didn’t because he wasn’t hungry.

That was when Kun knew that Sicheng was a bad liar.

At first, as positive as an eight year old’s mind could be, Kun thought that Sicheng was hungry because his mom didn’t have time to prepare any snack for Sicheng to bring to school. Since Kun’s mom usually would prepare the snacks (egg tarts, dumplings, buns, cut fruits, you name it) for Kun to bring to school in the morning, he then asked his mom to pack more because he wanted to share with Sicheng. His mom was more than happy to pack another snack box because she always had a soft spot for the tiny, timid boy. 

One day, as usual, Kun dropped by Sicheng’s house in the morning to have a walk together to school. That morning, Sicheng’s mom woke up late, so the whole house woke up late too, and Kun had to wait for a moment before Sicheng was finally ready to get to school. Sicheng almost left without bringing his money, then his mom suddenly shouted from her room, “Baby, don’t forget your money on the kitchen counter!”

Kun frowned.

If Sicheng’s mom gave him an allowance, then why was Sicheng always hungry after school, during those days before Kun gave him an extra snack box?

_ Something doesn’t seem right. _

Two days after, Kun decided to follow Sicheng during his break in secret.

He was really surprised when he found out that a bunch of senior students stopped Sicheng on his way to the washroom, and Sicheng looked very pale when he finally handed over all of his money to them.

A year ago, Kun promised himself that he would protect Sicheng and keep him safe. However, in this case, he was smart enough to know that defending Sicheng on the spot would only bring more trouble not only to Sicheng, but to himself, since: one, those students were older than them, and two, he didn’t know any martial arts to save his life.

_ There must be another way. _

_ Think, Qian Kun, think. _

After five minutes walking back and forth in front of his classroom, deep in thought, an invisible light bulb finally lighted up right above his head.

He decided to pay a visit to Mrs. Chong, one of his favorite teachers.

The very next day, Kun hid behind the bushes during his school break. It was a perfect spot to hide since it was in between the washroom and Sicheng’s classroom, so most probably, if all good luck’s on him, he could see clearly whatever was going to unfold from his hiding spot.

Five minutes later, Kun could see Sicheng walking slowly from his classroom to the direction of the washroom, like he was dreading whatever was going to happen. True to what Kun expected, the seniors suddenly appeared. Without saying anything, one of them just extended his hand, seemingly sure that Sicheng would immediately understand what he had to do.

Sicheng was still trying to fish out the money inside of his pocket when Kun suddenly realized,  _ where is Mrs. Chong? _ Once Sicheng gave the money, there would be no evidence of the bullying thing that’s been going on,  _ oh gosh where is she?? _

When Kun was still panicking and deep in thought, a sound of a phone camera clicking multiple times was heard from a hidden corner opposite of the bush where Kun was hiding.

Then Mrs. Chong showed up from that very corner.

“Hey, you four!” She shouted, “What are you all doing to Sicheng??”

Thanks to Mrs. Chong (and the picture proofs that she took right before she came out of hiding), the bullies were able to be reported to the school principal. Their school was very much against bullying, so the principal decided to call the parents of the bullies to inform them that their kids were suspended for a week. Sicheng’s parents were also called, and he would be put into a buddy program, in which a student would be assigned to accompany Sicheng at all times, to ensure that the bullying wouldn’t happen again.

When Mrs. Chong offered Kun to be Sicheng’s buddy, he immediately agreed in a heartbeat.

“You know that I will be your buddy from now on right?” Kun asked Sicheng when they were on their walk back home. “I hope you’re okay with that.”

Sicheng nodded, “Of course I am okay with that, ge,” he said with a smile. “Anyway, thank you very much.”

“No problem at all! I am more than happy to be your buddy-“

“Not only that, ge,” Sicheng cut him off. “Thank you for informing Mrs. Chong too.”

“Oh,” Kun was surprised. “You… knew it was me?”

“I saw you hiding in the bushes, ge.”

“Ahh.” Kun scratched the back of his head. “Luckily your bullies didn’t notice me then, or else the plan would fail because I was being too obvious!”

Sicheng smiled. “Anyway ge, I feel like asking my parents to enroll me into a martial art class.”

“Oh, really?” Kun exclaimed. “That’d be really good for you, Sicheng!”

“I think I need it so that I can protect myself,” Sicheng then looked at Kun. “And I want to be able to protect you in the future too.”

  
  


_____

  
  


Kun was fifteen and Sicheng was fourteen.

“Ge!” Sicheng whined as he dropped himself onto Kun’s bed. “I didn’t see you at the bus stop at our usual time today! I waited for half an hour, and since you didn’t show up, I went back home alone!”

Kun closed the book he was reading on his study desk, then turned around to see Sicheng spread himself out like a starfish on his bed. “I had a class meeting after school today. Didn’t you check your phone? I texted you!”

Sicheng grinned, “My phone ran out of battery ge, and I left it charging at home, so I haven’t seen it yet.”

Kun scoffed, then he reached into his school bag. “Here,” Kun passed Sicheng a small pink-coloured fabric bag. “Someone in my class asked me to pass this to you.”

Sicheng’s eyebrows furrowed, but he still accepted the bag nonetheless. He opened the small string that tied up the bag then looked at its contents.

Hershey’s Kisses.

Kun took a peek into the small bag, then he whistled, “Ooooh, she likes you, Sicheng!”

Sicheng only shrugged then unwrapped one chocolate. “Help yourself ge, you can have them all if you want.”

Kun frowned. “Why do you seem so indifferent? Aren’t you excited to know that someone is crushing on you? This classmate of mine is very pretty too!”

Sicheng looked away and muttered, “I am… not interested in girls.”

Silence ensued.

“Only girls, or… anyone in general?” Kun whispered.

Sicheng was silent for a while before answering, “I am only interested in boys, ge.”

Kun smiled softly. “Thank you for trusting me and letting me know about this, Sicheng. It must be hard for you to figure out and find the courage to do so.”

Sicheng looked up, his eyes widened. “You… are not disgusted with it?”

Kun shrugged casually. “Why am I supposed to feel disgusted when I am just like you?”

Sicheng’s eyes widened even further. “You…”

Kun smiled and nodded. “Took some time for me to figure it out, but now I am sure that I am only interested in boys as well.”

A soft smile slowly grew on Sicheng’s face. “I am happy for you, ge.”

Kun smiled even wider and squeezed Sicheng’s hand. “Thank you Sicheng, and I am happy for you too.”

  
  


_____

  
  


Kun was sixteen, and Sicheng was fifteen.

Kun finally had his first love (or so he thought).

It was with a junior named Lucas Wong.

They happened to know each other when they were volunteering at an orphanage together, as part of a charity program conducted by their school. Lucas was such a gentleman, ready to help Kun anytime, and always full of smiles. Kun was already hooked since the first time they met, and whatever he felt for Lucas became even more intense as they started hanging out together at school and texting each other.

“Sicheng.”

“Hm?”

“I think,” Kun looked at Sicheng who was lying down beside him, “I think I am in love.”

Sicheng’s eyebrows furrowed. “Don’t you think you’re too young to fall in love, ge?”

Kun flicked Sicheng’s forehead lightly, “People can even experience their first love when they’re ten, Sicheng! I am already too late by six years!”

Sicheng leaned up on his elbows and looked at Kun. “How did you know that he’s your first love, ge?”

Kun hummed for some time, trying to think of an elaborate answer. “My stomach always does that funny thing every time I am with him or when I am texting him. And I literally can’t stop thinking about him. I even already have scenarios in my head, like… my life with him and all that.” Kun blushed as he mentioned the last part.

Sicheng only stayed quiet, but he stared at Kun intensely.

“H-hey,” Kun poked Sicheng’s arm. “Why are you looking at me like that? You’re making me nervous, Sicheng.”

Sicheng looked like he was suddenly awoken from a trance, his body jolted in surprise. “U-uh, nothing, ge.” He then looked at Kun and gave him a solemn smile. “I hope you’ll be happy with him, ge.”

Except that didn’t happen.

Kun finally experienced his first heartbreak when one day, Lucas came to him and told him happily that he’s finally in a relationship with his classmate, Hendery. Kun congratulated him earnestly, but he didn’t come out of his room for lunch and dinner after he arrived home.

When Sicheng found him in his room, Kun was lying down facing the ceiling. His eyes were all red, and he was still hiccupping.

Sicheng squeezed himself into the blanket and laid down next to Kun as slowly as possible.

“Sicheng.” Kun whispered quietly.

“Yes, ge?”

“Can you give me a hug?”

Sicheng hummed, “If I give you a hug, then can you promise me to go down and eat, ge? Your mom is really worried, you know.”

Kun nodded, and he circled his arms around Sicheng’s waist. He then buried his head into Sicheng’s chest, and he suddenly cried again. Sicheng hugged Kun back and stroked his hair, whispering ‘sssh, you’ll be okay ge, you’ll be okay’ from time to time.

It took some time for Kun to finally stop crying, but Sicheng was still stroking his hair and hugging him close. 

“Sicheng.”

“Hm?”

“I am hoping, I am really hoping, that you won’t ever experience a heartbreak like I do,” Kun sniffled. “It just… hurts.”

Sicheng hummed, and he hugged Kun tighter.

“Sicheng.”

“Yes, ge?”

“Why am I so, so stupid?”

Sicheng frowned. “Why did you say that, ge?”

Kun raised his head and looked at Sicheng, “How come I didn’t realize that Lucas is in love with Hendery? He literally talked about him with me all the time. How come I didn’t realize the sparks in his eyes when he did so?” Kun buried his head into Sicheng’s chest again, “I am so, so stupid for not realizing it sooner.”

“Ge, look at me,” Sicheng lifted Kun’s chin with the softest touch, and looked at him in the eye. “Don’t you ever think that way, ge. You might be unaware, yes, but you’re never stupid. The Kun ge that I know is not stupid, at all. The Kun ge that I know is smart, kind, lovely, and such a hard worker.”

Kun couldn’t say anything back.

“So don’t ever, ever think that way again, okay ge?”

Kun nodded slowly, eyes still looking into Sicheng’s piercing gaze.

Something definitely shifted that night, between the two of them. 

But they didn’t know it (yet).

  
  


_____

  
  


Kun was nineteen, and Sicheng was eighteen.

Sicheng was finally legal to drink, so Kun decided that his second drinking experience (the first being drinking with Sicheng’s parents, of course) had to be something memorable and unforgettable.

So he decided that they should go to a bar.

“Ge,” Sicheng asked when they were in the cab. “Why a bar?”

Kun looked Sicheng in the eye. “Do you prefer the loud music of a club?”

Sicheng shook his head.

“See?” Kun smiled triumphantly as he bopped Sicheng’s nose. “I know you so well, didi!”

Sicheng pouted. “Why can’t we just, I don’t know, have a drink in your room or something?”

“It is the ambience, Sicheng. It is definitely much better to have a drink in the bar. And who knows maybe you’ll see any cutie that you’ll be interested in? It is a gay bar after all!”

Sicheng scoffed then looked at Kun. “As if there will be any cutie that will catch my eye, ge.”

“We’ll see!” Kun exclaimed excitedly. “Oh god, it would be so cute to finally see you crushing on someone if it happens!”

Sicheng only scoffed again, but he stayed quiet afterwards.

But true to Kun’s words, Sicheng actually liked the ambience of the bar that Kun brought him to. The music was great, and he could still have a conversation with Kun without having to shout over the music. The concoctions that the bar offered were nice and to his liking too. It was almost considered as one perfect evening for Dong Sicheng.

But it all changed when he returned from the washroom.

It was quite a long queue to enter the washroom, so Sicheng had no choice but to leave Kun for quite some time. However, he didn’t expect that some guy would sit on his seat next to Kun’s and talk to Kun with stars in his eyes.

Sicheng was seeing red.

(Must be the alcohol talking)

He inhaled and exhaled a few times to clear up his brain a little bit, then he walked steadily to his seat. Kun directly turned around when he heard the clacking of Sicheng’s leather shoe heels.

“Oh, Sicheng! What took you so long? Let me introduce you to-“

“Ge, can we go home now?” Sicheng asked in his deep voice, trying to assert dominance. “I don’t feel so good.”

Kun’s facial expression quickly changed from confusion to worry, then he stood up from his seat and gathered his belongings. “Do you need to sit down first? You can have a seat while I am calling for cab outside-“

“It’s okay ge, I can wait together with you outside.” Sicheng squeezed Kun’s hand softly.

Kun nodded. He talked a bit to his ten-minute chatting partner to apologize and excuse himself, then he held Sicheng’s hand and pulled him towards the entrance to get a cab.

Although he was actually not drunk and didn’t experience any single sign of a hangover the next day, Sicheng still blamed the alcohol for causing him to act like that the previous night.

  
  


_____

  
  


Kun was twenty, and Sicheng was nineteen.

“I knew you would be here,” Kun huffed as he sat on one fluffy patch of grass, next to Sicheng who was lying down with airbuds on and eyes closed, then he pouted. “Ten was looking for you just now.”

Sicheng stayed quiet.

“Sicheng!” Kun pouted even more. “I know you’re not sleeping!”

Sicheng opened one eye then turned his head a little bit to look at Kun. “Yes, I heard you, ge. If Ten ge really needs me, then he would call or text me. I haven’t heard anything from him until now, so it must be something unimportant.”

“I knew it!” Kun fumed, “I knew he only wanted to make me angry! That little rascal-“

“What did he say, ge?” Sicheng cut him off, both eyes already closed again.

“He-“ Kun huffed again, “He asked me where my boyfriend is.”

Sicheng full on chuckled, then he opened his eyes. “Let me guess, then you said ‘Sicheng is not my boyfriend’ to him?”

“In my defense!” Kun raised his hand. “In my defense, it is because he always said that to me every time he was talking about you! And every single damn time, I always got ‘Sicheng’ as an answer when I asked him what he meant by my boyfriend. It is only understandable if I immediately think of you when he keeps on mentioning it!”

Sicheng finally sat down and took a good look at Kun. Kun got so worked up, his face became red and he kept on huffing and puffing. His arms were crossed, and he still pouted.

_ Cute. _

“Then why are you so worked up, ge?”

“Because it is not only him! Yangyang, Chenle, Renjun, heck even Lucas too! They all call you my boyfriend ever since we started living together!” Kun whined. “I mean, what is wrong with two uni students renting an apartment together? It is way cheaper that way, uni students like us are always broke, and it is not like we are the only uni students living together! Yangyang and Xiaojun live together too!”

Sicheng wanted to point out that Yangyang and Xiaojun had started dating a week ago, but he didn’t want to make his gege become more worked up than he already was.

“Come.” Sicheng handed Kun one of his airbuds. “I have a good song that can calm you down.”

Kun put the airbud into his left ear. Sicheng scrolled through his playlist to find one specific song and pressed the play button.

_ Be still my heart _

_ Lately its mind is all its own _

_ It would go far and wide _

_ Just to be near you _

“Oh, this song is nice, what’s the title?” asked Kun.

“We Could Be in Love,” Sicheng answered with a smile.

Kun hummed, then he laid down next to Sicheng. He also closed his eyes to enjoy the song even more.

Knowing that his gege had calmed down a bit, Sicheng inched closer to Kun and whispered to his right ear, “See, ge? I am such a caring boyfriend, don’t you think so?”

Kun only slapped Sicheng’s arm in reply.

  
  


_____

  
  
  


Kun was still twenty, and Sicheng was still nineteen.

Kun spent the whole week working on his musical composition assignment. Kun was always known as a meticulous person when it came to assignments (and the weight of that assignment towards the whole semester’s assessment was 25% okay), so he literally only had a total of 10 hours of sleep for that one whole week.

It was understandable that he came down with a fever right on the day eight.

Luckily he had submitted his assignment, he didn’t have any class, and he was only supposed to mentor his juniors that day, so he requested for the mentoring to be switched to another day. His juniors agreed to it, and they wished him speedy recovery.

Oh how he wished for a speedy recovery, indeed.

His whole body was shivering, and he didn’t even have any energy to wake up from his bed, let alone to reheat some food and get his medicines.

He was still considering crawling to the kitchen to grab some bread and call it a day when Sicheng suddenly barged into his room.

“Ge,” Sicheng asked worriedly. “Are you okay? It’s nine, you usually already woke up and prepared breakfast by this time.”

“Can’t…. cold…” Kun answered through his chattering teeth.

Sicheng quickly walked closer to his gege and touched his forehead. “Holy shit ge, you’re burning! Have you had your medicines?”

Kun shook his head, “No… eat….”

Sicheng nodded understandingly, “I bought some cheese buns yesterday, I’ll grab you some, you eat them first, then you have your medicine, okay? At least have your stomach filled first. Wait a bit.”

Sicheng quickly went to their kitchen, then he returned with one cheese bun, a glass of water, and Kun’s medicines. He slowly helped Kun sit down on his bed and fed him with the cheese bun after tearing it off into small pieces. Once Kun had finished one whole bun, Sicheng handed him his medicines then helped him return back to his sleeping position.

When Kun thought that Sicheng would leave him once everything was done, he was surprised that Sicheng climbed into his bed and spooned him instead.

“Go…. school….”

“I have texted my professor, I told him that you’re sick and I have to take care of you, he understood and he would send me the notes through email.” Sicheng grinned. “I have always been his golden child after all.”

“You… breakfast… food….”

“I have had my breakfast. I also texted Ten ge to get us some food from that Thai place that you like for lunch and dinner, and he said he’d get some porridge from the  _ you tiao _ store next to it too.” Sicheng hugged Kun even tighter. “Don’t worry your pretty little head too much ge. I can take care of my own self. I can take care of  _ us _ .”

Kun hummed, feeling a bit calmer, then he made himself comfortable in Sicheng’s embrace.

He didn’t know whether it was part of his fever dream or not, but he felt Sicheng kissing the crown of his head just seconds before he fell into deep sleep.

  
  


_____

  
  


Kun was twenty two, and Sicheng was twenty one.

Kun had finished his bachelor degree, and he got a job as an assistant producer with one pretty famous recording company right after he graduated. He didn’t really have time to meet up with his friends after he started working, so when Ten called him and said that he wanted to have lunch with Kun since he’s nearby the company, Kun directly said yes.

“Wow it’s been six months since you started working, right,” Ten said absentmindedly as he stirred his americano.

Kun hummed, “These were the craziest six months that I had ever experienced in my whole life, but it was worth it. I really learned a lot.”

“Are you still that busy these days too?” Ten asked with concern.

“Hmm, not really. The producer that I work for doesn’t have any artist rushing to record this month, so we’re only working on demos these days. The company said that there will be three artists in the list next month though, so I have to get ready.” Kun grinned.

“Well, as long as you enjoy it, then that’s good,” Ten grinned back, “How did Sicheng react to your extremely busy days, though? You know how protective he can be of you.”

“Sicheng was… being Sicheng, of course.” Kun shrugged. “He reminded me to drink enough water, dropped by the company to bring me dinner after his classes… I told him not to because I know how busy final year students can be, but him being the stubborn being he is, he still insisted to do all of them.”

Ten smiled softly. “He just loves you too much, you know.”

Kun nodded as he cut his steak into smaller pieces. “Yeah, I know.”

“You know I’m not talking about brotherly love, right?”

Kun’s fork stopped mid-air. He slowly returned it back onto the plate. 

“Then what kind of love are you talking about?” he asked, although he was not ready to know the answer.

“I am sure you know what I mean, Kun.” Ten sipped his coffee in between. “Have you seen the way he always looks at you?”

“He looks at me like how a brother does,” Kun answered so quickly, that it sounded more like a robotic response instead of an answer that he really thought about.

Ten chuckled, “Who are you lying to, Kun? Yourself? Everyone can really see what’s going on between you two! It’s been  _ years _ !”

Kun huffed, “Then what do you want me to do about it?”

Ten put down his cup and rested both arms on the table. “What about you? How do  _ you _ look at him?”

Kun looked at his lap. “I am supposed to see him as my brother.”

Ten’s eyes softened, as if he was starting to realize the dilemma that his best friend was experiencing, “But does your heart want to see him as a brother though?”

Kun whispered, “No…”

“Kun,” Ten took one of Kun’s hands and squeezed it. “Don’t you ever feel guilty of what you’re feeling about Sicheng. He is not your real brother, for god’s sake. You have all the rights in this world to fall in love with him.”

Kun raised his head and looked at Ten. “But he… he doesn’t feel the same way.”

“And how are you so sure about that, hm?”

Kun huffed again, “What do you want me to do about it? He’s been there with me for nearly my whole life, Ten. If I tell him what I feel and he doesn’t feel the same way… I can’t imagine losing him, Ten. I can’t.”

Ten gave Kun a somber look. “But what if someone finally comes along and takes him from you, Kun? You’ll lose him either way.”

  
  


_____

  
  


Kun was twenty three and Sicheng was twenty two.

It had been a year since Kun and Ten had their heart to heart talk in that cafe, and Kun hadn’t done anything ever since, because he was too scared of losing Sicheng.

Never did he know the someone that Ten had warned him about finally came along.

And that someone’s name was Nakamoto Yuta.

Sicheng had landed himself a job in a Japanese engineering company, and soon he also managed to catch the interest of Yuta, one of his senior executives. Yuta had been helping Sicheng a lot in adapting to the working world. They sometimes had dinner together on days when they had to go overtime at work.

Kun knew about the existence of Nakamoto Yuta because he dropped Sicheng home many times.

And Kun was fully aware of the sparkles in Yuta’s eyes everytime he looked at Sicheng.

Kun then suddenly realized one thing.

Ever since Sicheng confessed about his sexual orientation many years ago, Kun had never, ever seen Sicheng dating even one guy.

_ Is my presence holding him down? _

Kun then did what he thought as the best for the both of them.

He started avoiding Sicheng.

He spent more time at the studio. Since his working hours were pretty much flexible, he only went for work after Sicheng had left. He usually cooked dinner for Sicheng in the morning before he left for work, then kept them in the fridge so that Sicheng could just reheat it after he arrived home. Kun would pack some for his own lunch and dinner at work, then he would only return home nearing midnight. He also only replied to Sicheng’s texts if necessary, and he never initiated any call or text to Sicheng like before.

This new arrangement worked in Kun’s favor for around one month.

Then one day, when he just went back from work, he suddenly saw Yuta and Sicheng outside of their apartment.

And Yuta was leaning in for a kiss.

Kun tried so,  _ so _ hard to walk away from the scene ever so quietly, then he only texted Ten, asking if he could stay there for a night, when he was already at the parking lot.

He was about to get into his car and was thinking of crying out loud while driving to Ten’s apartment, when Sicheng suddenly pulled his arm.

“Ge,” Sicheng was still trying to catch his breath. “Where are you going?”

“I… I am going to Ten’s.” Kun was fumbling with the bunch of keys that he had been holding. “He suddenly texted me and asked me to come over, he wanted to discuss... some things.”

“I saw you there, in front of our apartment,” Sicheng continued.

“Y-yeah, I wanted to pack some clothes, just in case Ten asked me to stay overnight… but you seemed... busy, so I didn’t want to interrupt-”

“Ge,” Sicheng said with a tone full of determination, “I know you’re jealous.”

Kun finally looked up, “Excuse me?”

“I know you saw Yuta senpai leaning in to kiss me,” Sicheng continued unwaveringly. “That’s why you ran away, right?”

Kun couldn’t help but fuming, “What the fuck are you trying to imply here, Dong Sicheng?”

“Ge, please,” Sicheng pleaded. “Is it really hard to tell me the truth?”

“Even if I tell you the truth,” Kun raised his tone, “Will it make any difference to you?”

“It will, ge,” Sicheng whispered. “Especially when I have been waiting for it, for all my whole life.”

Kun was stunned.

Sicheng suddenly reached into his jeans pocket and took out his airbuds and his phone. He put one airbud softly into Kun’s left ear, then he pressed the play button in his phone.

_ Anyone who's seen us _

_ Knows what's going on between us _

_ It doesn't take a genius _

_ To read between the lines _

_ And it's not just wishful thinking _

_ Or only me who's dreaming _

_ I know what these are symptoms of _

_ We could be in love _

Kun’s eyes widened, then he looked up to see Sicheng’s desperate face.

“Ge, remember three years ago, when I introduced this song to you for the first time? Don’t you think this song suited us really well?” Sicheng started again, “Everyone can see it, ge. Literally everyone.”

“I…” Kun was out of words. “I thought you only saw me as a brother, Sicheng.”

“Ge, if you really saw the way I look at you, you would realize that I don’t see you as a brother. Not at all,” Sicheng said desperately as he held Kun’s hand. “Remember back then when I came out to you and I said that I was only interested in guys? I was actually only interested in one guy, ge, and it was you. You’re literally my first love. And it still hasn’t changed until today.”

“Wait, so… all these years… you weren’t in a relationship because-”

Sicheng smiled softly and nodded. “I was waiting for you, ge.”

Kun was speechless.

“But then everyone said that I have been waiting for too long,” Sicheng scoffed. “And I can’t believe I had to follow Yuta senpai’s suggestion to really find out that you’re really in love with me, and it apparently worked.”

Kun’s eyes widened. “Hold up, so… the stunt back there…”

Sicheng chuckled. “Yes, it was all Yuta senpai’s plan, ge. We were waiting for you to come home, then we went outside, and he would pretend to kiss me. He said that it would coax some reactions from you. Apparently it really did.”

“Wait,” Kun raised his hand. “I thought Yuta senpai is interested in you?”

Sicheng laughed out loud, “Ge, Yuta senpai has a longtime boyfriend, they’re practically married! I am literally their adopted son, that’s what they said to me,” Sicheng scoffed again. “I don’t know why they think of me as their son, I am much taller than them two.”

Kun was speechless once again.

Then he hit Sicheng’s chest.

“I can’t believe you had to trick me like that!”

“That’s because of how desperate I was, ge!” Sicheng exclaimed. “I was too scared that what I am feeling right now is one-sided!”

Kun couldn’t say anything more because honestly, he really could relate with what Sicheng had said.

“So,” Kun lifted his head to look at Sicheng’s eyes. “What are we?”

Sicheng smiled softly then squeezed Kun’s hand. “I am definitely more than happy to be your lover, ge. I don’t want to be your brother, that’s for sure.”

Kun pouted and hit Sicheng’s chest weakly as Sicheng giggled. “Okay, I like the sound of it… boyfriend.”

Sicheng smiled even wider then hugged Kun tightly. “You never knew how many years I have been wanting to hear that coming from you, ge.”

Kun snuggled further into Sicheng’s warm hug. “And you never knew how happy it made me to finally be able to call you ‘my boyfriend’, Sicheng.”

They were still enjoying each other’s embrace when Kun’s phone suddenly rang.

“Hello, Ten?”

“Yo Kun, are you still brokenhearted and coming over to my house, or are you finally able to snog face with Sicheng?”

Kun regretted putting his phone on speaker that night until today.

  
  


* * *

  
  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Sooooo that was my very first kunwin/winkun! I have always wanted to write them as childhood friends that eventually become lovers because somehow Winwin exudes the "Now that I have grown up, it's my turn to take care of you, ge" energy towards Kun... or maybe it's just me lol. 
> 
> And THANK YOU so much for reading until the end! Comments and kudos would keep me going and would be greatly appreciated! Oh and you can always approach me @kuntenjohnil on twitter and cc!


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